IVORY COAST IRISH SPRING (NEAR PASADENA)
BANK OF AFRICA (BoA) (Downey Branch)
Dear respectful friend
I trust and hope with prayer that you are in good health as that is the important.
I am Sameul Isa and I write to you with tears in eyes and great honor as it is my privilege to respect you. I am the auditing manager of Bank of Africa (BofA). During auditing of bank I come across money of a deceased person who is dead and writer of situational comedies on television, who died tripping on ottoman (http://www.tvland.com/dickvandyke). His estate is enrichened by large residual check of 13 million lira (U.S.$7 dollar). His estate also receive additional more money of 8 million lira (U.S. $4.26 dollar) for DVD sale, and O lira for show on internet because all know that is for purpose of promotional only.
In due course of time I should immediately enlist your grateful help to put claims, since all of next of kin are deceased or at least not returning calls. I have set up an account in Downey in hopes of speeding up claim that is guaranteed by law to be yours as soon as you send grateful check and a baseball cap, preferably of popular show and not too gay like, say, “Ugly Betty.” In return, as bank laws insist, upon receivable of certified check for $15,000 and cap (“Cold Case” would be great, by the way), I will transfer money from residual account to you for us to divide according to law, with ten percent put aside for really cool set of Bose headphones.
This transaction is morever risk free, at least for me, and to prove so with great delight and privilege, out of a sign of respect, I am honored to demand you please forward to me original Social Security card (no copies, please!). Drivers license would be nice too. Please do so to enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you as arranged. Upon receiving your check and cap, I will honor you with visit to country and home or at the very least go to Pinkberry. Irregardless, trust that I will not fail to bring notice of this transaction immediately so you should not entertain thought of fear. I await with delirium your response below.
Thank you. I hope you are blessed and not too bright. Good luck with the strike.